Pause. Breathe. Hope. Heal.
Dear Reader! To make life easier for you, I wanted to give you this information in a couple different formats. You can either read this blog post, or click the link below to download the podcast and listen to the episode on the go.
Internal Family Systems or (IFS) is a therapeutic modality developed by Richard Schwartz. In IFS, the idea is that we all have different parts of ourselves, or subpersonalities within our mental system. If a friend said, “Hey where do you want to go to eat on Friday?” You may respond and say, “Part of me feels like going out for sushi, but part of me would love to try out the new taco place.” This is language we are used to. This is a non-pathologizing approach to therapy which asserts that there are no bad parts, only parts forced into bad roles.
In IFS, we have Parts which comprise of our Exiles, Managers, and Firefighters, and we have the Self.
Exiles:
Our exiles hold a lot of our little “t” and big “T” trauma. They are often young parts of our system who carry the burden of our adverse experiences. In order for our nervous system to not feel overwhelmed, these parts were locked away. It was a brilliant strategy that our system used to cope. However, each person gets to choose whether they would like to keep adopting that strategy or if they would like to begin the work of unburdening those exiled parts.
Managers:
The next part we’ll talk about are called Managers. These are proactive protector parts that strategize and plan out ways to ensure that adverse experiences don’t happen to us again. They work to keep our Exiles out of our awareness so we don’t get overwhelmed by the big feelings they are carrying.
Firefighters:
The last part of our Internal Family System are called Firefighters. These are reactive protector parts that come to our aid when our nervous system detects that we are in danger. This doesn’t mean we are in actual danger, it could be that we are feeling bored, or heard something we disagree with, or one of our Exiles is feeling the pain of abuse, neglect, shame etc. This is where the Firefighter rushes in to “fix” things. Unfortunately, the Firefighters strategies can be more extreme than the situation warrants and they may choose to cope by overworking, smoking, drinking to excess, using drugs, self-harm etc.
Self:
The central idea in IFS is that we all have a Self. When we are in Self, we can help our parts to soften back and release their burdens. You can tell you’re in Self-energy if you are exhibiting these traits of the 8-Cs.
- Curiosity
- Calm
- Clarity
- Connectedness
- Confidence
- Courage
- Creativity
- Compassion
One of the core concepts of IFS is that all parts are welcome. The purpose of IFS is to help the client gain greater access to Self. From there, the client can begin to listen to their parts, and begin to build self-compassion and self-trust which can lead to unburdening and deep inner healing.
Click here, or on the picture below for a free download of the 8-Cs.
So, right now as you read this post, remember to take a moment in your day to remind yourself to pause, breathe, hope, and heal.
If you would like to see if we would be a good therapeutic fit, schedule a free 20-minute consultation by clicking the button below.
